Monday, June 25, 2012

"Get Me Out Of Here!"

I was asked about a month or two ago if I would go to a wedding with Shanna. Well, actually I was assuming I was going to go since her husband wouldn't be able to attend this said event. I have met the bride maybe twice...although I cannot even remember where or why I had met her. My connection with her is The Anniversary Inn. She worked in Boise. Shanna became friends with a couple of them and when I went up on a business trip for work a couple years back, I met the one friend. Basically they are friends of a friend.

The wedding was located in Orifino, ID. The very tip of Idaho, 11 hours away. As the event was approaching I might have thought that we wouldn't go. "Maybe Shanna will decide not to go." The thought of driving that far for a 4 hourish event seemed tough.

It was never cancelled. My bags were packed and I met Shanna Friday morning at 6am. There was no going back.

The drive was actually a lot better than we thought it was going to be. We are experts when it comes to road trips. Seattle, L.A, Lake Havasu, all of these are at least 10 hours and we have learned what works for us. Snacks, mixed cds (lol) and dehydrated bodies are the way to go. We also decided to grab an audio book. This helped immensely, although Shanna had to monitor me every once in awhile....the narrators voice was just so darn soothing.

Hours passed. Snacks were consumed, stories were swapped, cows bred in open fields and eventually the landscape became somewhat beautiful. This was something I did not expect.

We finally arrived in Orifino and it was so much more than I anticipated. It was beautiful! It was lush. It was friendly. It looks a lot like Washington. There was a river right by our hotel and our room was perfect for us. We were expecting a nasty hotel for the cheap rates but it was a pleasant surprise. Soon after we arrived we went out on "the town" and checked out our surroundings.

Afterwards we enjoyed a local Mexican restaurant and then decided to run to the store to get some supplies. "The grocery store is only 4-5 blocks down the road." After being instructed by our hotel clerk we walked, and walked and walked at least 10 blocks. When we finally arrived we found it difficult to leave. I got in an aisle with a near albino with snake eyes. He stared into my soul. I learned a lot about this young man that came back from Seattle where he went for work and then apparently came back for family. After he stared at me for too long, I thanked him and walked away, hoping Shanna was ready. She too was stuck in her line with the cashier. Her cashier was going on about how it was such a small world. Apparently she knew someone from Farmington. I then realized in my haste I had left my groceries with the man and as I turned around he was standing there with a grin and my supplies.....small town folk are funny/creepy. We walked the long journey back and went to bed.

Next morning we filled up on complementary hot breakfast and went for a 3 mile walk. It was all incline and we were 100% impressed. We then drove around town and anything that looked semi interested turned into a photo opportunity.
 Everyone loves a good wood bridge, right? It was huge and beautiful and I wanted to stop. So having nothing to do all day before the wedding at 4:00, we did just that.
Up on a hill are a couple of buildings which include, a high school, a mental hospital and the prison. Surrounding these cheerful buildings was a single barred up depressing gem. It was creepy looking. The landscaping was beautiful though. There were a family of deer sitting near the building. I would love to know what history this building has.
 Next we visited the Dam. We find Dams to be incredibly lame....but alas, this isn't much of a tourist town. Not a whole lot to do.
Next we found some water and cooled our feet and made a new canine friend. He lingered just as long as the grocery folk did.
 After wandering around we returned to the hotel and got ready for the wedding. I started feeling the anxiety build. I double checked my purse for migraine and headache pills and up the mountain we climbed to the ranch.

The wedding was quick, it was over within 10 minutes. Then cocktail hour came. It was uncomfortable. We sat at our table looking pathetic and anti social as all the stuffy people started to relax as the booze flowed through them. Shanna got some wine and the smell made me nauseous. I remember that smell from our winery tours in Napa when Anth and I were on vacation. The night dragged on and I could feel an anxiety headache spread across my forehead. I did not want to be there. At all.

Then dinner happened. The couple we saw in our hotel parking lot earlier sat at our table and we started to converse. Then Shanna got up and started talking with her old friends. I wanted to run away. I wanted to find a dark hole and crawl in it. I felt small and insignificant surrounded by all these people I didn't know and was so unsure of how to mingle with. People would talk to me and fight or flight set in. "Get me out of here!"

Then dancing started. It got dark and the booze and drunk people became more apparent. I then got an urge I have never had before. The urge to drink. The urge to let loose. The urge to not feel so worried and uptight. The urge to be a part of all the conversations. The urge to get off the chair and  dance. The urge to not feel so insecure. The urge to not feel judged. I wanted to give in. No one would know. Shanna was up on the stage dancing and I could have easily grabbed a drink. It was really difficult to resist this temptation that I have never had to deal with before. It was a sad and low moment for me.

When Shanna returned I told her I was ready to go. It was dark, it was almost 11. We had been there since 4. I couldn't imagine how hard it was going to be driving down the mountain when it was difficult for me to drive in the dark. She was so great and agreed that it was time. Someone stumbled off the stage and rolled their ankle and someone was mentioning the vomit that was just spewed in the house. It was time to leave.

I drove us home and felt a huge relief. I had resisted the urge. It is really hard for me to not feel included and that was not easy for me. I am glad that Shanna has always been such a respectful friend. She knows who I am and what I stand for and I am so glad she has never pushed me. In that moment, if she would have tried to persuade me, I might have caved and that thought is so scary. I went to bed and said a prayer of gratitude for getting through the night.

The next morning we went for another walk and visited a cemetery that we had found the day before. It was so peaceful and old. I was glad we were able to visit it.
 We then took one last stroll through our little town and packed up our belongings.
Orifino is a pleasant surprise of a town. I wouldn't mind visiting it again. The trip was a blast besides the wedding, but even that was a good reminder to me to always be on your guard (:

We drove 7 hours and stayed at The Anniversary Inn in Boise. It was so fun to see that building again.

This morning we woke up, had breakfast and finished the last 4 hours of our trip. It is good to be home. Anthony was excited to see me. "I stretched out the groceries for as long as I could." It feels good to be missed and needed (:

Dear Shanna,

Thanks for another fun road trip. Although it wasn't the "Vacation" of our dreams, it turned out to be a lot better than we both expected. You're the best!

Love, Linds


Alicia said...

Sounds like you had a fairly good trip. I always thought of Idaho as a boring, potato filled state. The northern area looks nice from your pictures.

Tyrel said...

I am sorry I didn't finish reading the rest of your post. I stopped at "I felt the urge not to feel judged. I wanted to give in, no one would ever known." From there, in my mind, you enjoyed some hard liquor, shook it up on the dance floor and found yourself the next morning in someone elses hotel room with a tattoo on your right hip. Possibly a a dagger with barbed wire but more likely some cutsey animal. Yes, that is how I choose to have the rest of this post go. If it didn' may have let me down :)

Kelsey Fairbanks said...

So i actually read this last night on my phone, but it wouldn't let me comment. CAn i just say how much i love you two? also, you take amazing photos. what kind of camera do you use? and you are looking so good! not sure what you're doing these days, but you look great! i love your hair. and your face.

Shanna said...

Dear Linds,

So many emotions ran through me as I read this post.

#1. No matter how hideous the road trip, we always have a good time. Maybe not 100% of the time, but we always survive. I also believe we have had fewer low points through the years and miles of hideous terrain.

#2. You are a good friend, a REALLY good friend! To travel all that way and sit through the wedding of someone you barely know. You will never know how much I appreciated your company! I certainly wouldn't have left the room had I gone alone...that was one creepy town;)

#3. I'm sorry the wedding was so hard. I know we both went into it knowing that, but I feel so bad that you were that miserable. I'm not saying I thought you were having a good time; but had I known you were that low we would have left sooner. I'm also so proud of you for standing by your convictions! I'm pretty sure I would've caved....well I guess I kind of did lol. You are really great!

I would have to say that overall, the whole trip went about 110% better then I anticipated. Our room didn't smell like a urinal, and the location made for great photo taking. Oh, and we were able to cross of the Dworshak dam off our lucky are we? I guess the lesson I learned from all of this is this...begin with low expectations. LOL!

Thanks for being the best road trip buddy ever!

jendegiulio said...

Ok sounds like you drive was just as long as ours. I'll have to look on a map to see where Orifino is. You were smart & were prepared for your road trip. We had snacks the way there but no music, you would think one of us would have downloaded music on our phones to listen to in the car. We had to keep pushing the button to find a radio station with decent music. You got some great pictures. It looks beautiful there.

jessirichins76 said...

I think you're great! Seriously great! And I'm glad you have a good friend like Shanna. You amaze me daily! Or often as you blog! ;) I love you tons! very first thought when I opened your blog was, "Damn! Lindsey looks GOOD!" Jessi