Thursday, February 4, 2010

Mr. Miracle Man

I am fat. I realize this. Therefore an intervention needs to occur for the weight to come off. It's an excuse, I realize that. But my motivation alone will not change things. Last night a partial intervention occurred. It was odd....
My mom told me last week about a miracle man in Salt Lake that helps the fat, weak, and lonely of heart. This man was giving a seminar. She thought that maybe he would be selling that one drug that you shoot up in your arm that helps melt the fat. Instantly I thought "Its a scam, but if its under a $100 then sign me up.". I have been sucked into numerous infomercials in my lifetime and I knew that I would have to be strong. Me, Kristi, and my Mom called in and got registered for the seminar. Immediately upon arrived we were given a form or test as you will. We were told to grade each section: How often does diarrhea occur? How often are you bloated? How often do you release gas? These were all very awkward questions. To put it lightly, it took awhile for me to compose myself and to realize that "this was serious."

The miracle man came in and began his powerpoint to the crowd....of about 15 people. Did I mention that I was the youngest one there? Numerous times the miracle man would begin a sentence with "Remember back in the 70's when......" After an hour and a half of story time he ended with "Normally a consultation with me is $125, but today I am only charging $25 (Red Flag). I was in the wrong state of mind. He spoke so eloquently and made me believe that I would be skinny at any moment. So I forked out my $25 and I now have an appointment with just him on Monday for an hour and half of him poking and prodding and figuring out why I am fat and how he can get me nonfat. At this moment, a day later, after a night of rest I feel like a fool. I know how to lose weight. Its called hard work, carrots, water, chicken broth and a crap load of discipline and motivation. I think I will go to the consultation (obviously because I paid for it already) and if he says something to the effect of "Buy this protein shake, or buy this book, or pay me 1000 dollars and you will be healed" then I will say no and walk out.

But......if I hear something to the effect of "This is the region you need to work out. This is what you need to eat. This is how you get motivated. Then I might give him my money, I just might. We'll see, We'll see. You will hear more of this. Monday night I'm sure I will have plenty to say. I need guidance. I hope this miracle man can help.

7 comments:

Life as Linds said...
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Alicia said...
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Alicia said...

Sorry about the blank comment. I obviously can't post things without accidently doing it before I'm done.

Can't believe you actually paid to see this guy. Hopefully he can help you with your weight goals.

The Jensen Family said...

For the love, don't do it, don't waste anymore money. Be happy, be free. Like you said, you will do it when YOU do it. He can't make things work for you. Sure I admit, I have done half the weight loss programs out there and for heck sakes, I think the best program is watching the biggest loser and then going for a run afterwards and it's free. Ok, so atleast that is my new plan. Good luck!

Jill said...

Hmmm, wait. Where did you hear this man from? It sounds like the office I was just working in (See my last post). Where is the appointment? If I were you, I'd bring your sister, your mom or Shanna with you...it sounds weird.

What happens if you worked out with Shanna?
If you want to spend money, I honestly think seeking a personal trainer wouldn't be a terrible idea, they will tell you what regions you need to work out, how many minutes or hours a week and they will make sure you don't pull your muscle by doing so. All gyms are different so I would call around to get some prices, usually even only 5 visits with a PT is helpful and hopefully you can continue on alone.

If you dont have $$ for that, I honestly think you can do it by yourself!!!!! Self-motivation is a huge thing and it takes a lot to get up from bed, work, where ever you are and actually put on work out clothes. Don't focus on anyone around you (as hard as it may be) just pretend you are there by yourself, don't look at anyone at a gym and say, "Ugh, I wish I were like them" because you could be one day. Everyone at a gym is trying and working out for their own sake, not anyone else. You are all doing the same thing and its a good feeling once you get home and realize that you actually went. Don't over-do it, just go twice a week for about a month...then three times a week after that. Girls dont need to work out 5-7 days a week. If you maintain a healthy diet like you usually do at work (salad, fruit, veggies, low-fat items), you'll be in shape in no time. Don't get fatty meat. Try to avoid meat for a bit. Stay away from sugary things. and ANYthing that is high in Sodium. I always always always look at labels before I buy something and if it has too much sugar or sodium, I don't buy it. Because theres something better.

I know its easy to type this up ...but really, don't worry so much. Maybe get a membership with Anthony and make him go with you?!

Keep me posted on Miracle Man...

KEK said...

I love your new layout. It's super cute. Are you a member of Picnik too? I used the program to edit some of my older pictures. I like to use the graph too, 'cause I can't figure it out on Photoshop.

Anyways, I lacked motivation to excersice for quite some time too. I did a lot of complaining about my weight, but I wasn't doing anything about it. I guess I expected the weight would magically disappear. I heard of a lot of 'how to lose weight' ideas, even the shot in the arm (you mentioned) above was recommended from a friend.

The only way to lose weight is too excersice, and healthy eating habits. It's the stone cold truth. I think we all want a remedy or quick way to do it. I know I'm not a fine example, but I've been trying.

The hardest problem for me is eating what I needed for my body. Of course, I was lacking iron, because I don't eat meat. I was eating too many soy-base products. I've had to add supplements/vitamins this year.

I hope you find a plan that works for you. I can't wait to read about Monday. I love the irony, and humor in your posts.

Shanna said...

I am trying this once more...I really hope it works.

Anyway, you did not mention the form when we previously spoke...I can only imagine your answers LOL!

I cannot wait until your Monday appointment! I want to know what this miracle man has to tell you. LOL