Thursday, January 20, 2011

Eye Doctor

Went to the eye doctor the other day. Let me begin by saying that I had at one point in my life 20/20 vision.....er whatever is better than 20/20. I was proud of this. It set me apart from the rest of my 4 eyed family members. I was special, not adopted....I truly believed this. I must have been so perfect in heaven that the rest of the family was cursed with bad eye sight, but not I, Lindsey.

Well, maybe my head go too big, or maybe I sinned too much, because recently I started to see a change. Signs started to blur and at night I would always get headaches when driving. Perfect. I got me signed up for an appointment, the story begins. It's just an appointment, nothing too special.

The doctor did a couple of tests. "Number 1, Number 2?" I explained to her how my vision was declining rapidly. I then told her my dirty little ear secret that I will now share with you all. My right ear is freakishly attached to my head. Most ears are, I get that. Here is how I will be explain it. Put your finger on the top of your ear and bend it down. Mine does not bend. Picture me with sunglasses, its hilarious. My sunglasses will lean to the right because well, there just isn't a normal ear to hold it up. Most the time I shove my sunglasses in my hair or I just deal with the droopiness. I am an epic mess in the summer heat. The tests continue....

I started to panic thinking about the surgery that would need to occur for my new glasses to properly fit. Who knows if the insurance would pick it up. "Um, hi, this is Lindsey, I need a surgery for my ear, its attached to my head, just go ahead and give it a nice little slice." No, not going to work. I bet anyone could cut it for my though. I could be like a walking circumcision (:

This was her response.

"Honestly, there will not be a customer with better vision than you today. I am thinking that you use to have 20/20 vision or even better and now that you aren't as awesome as you use to be you are panicking."

Wow.......well alright then.

She dilated my eyes, did another test to make sure they were still the same "just in case I wasn't trying to hard" the first time and then she wrote me out a prescription for some glasses for when I drive at night.

I then walked out the door with those old lady sunglasses so my freakishly dilated eyes wouldn't turn to dust from the blazing sun.

Oh and Anthony came along. While I was being told I wasn't perfect anymore he was shopping for a new razor. He walked out with some deodorant, a new beard trimmer and $59 poorer from the exam. When I put my pride aside and buy the night glasses I will take a picture. They will be lopsided.

6 comments:

Warren and Kelsey Fairbanks said...

It's okay. You just have to come to terms with it. My glasses are lopsided, too. I bet you will look super cute with your new glasses! Sorry about your eyesight though... I still think you're awesome!

The DeGiulio's said...

Im sorry you had to get glasses but Im sure they are super cute. I have glasses but hardly wear them, they give me a headache. Poor Bailee has a slim chance of having good eyes considering shad & I both have wore contacts since we were teenages. Sadly I think my eyes have gotten worst. We both have eye appointments the end of this month.

Alicia said...

Eye doctors are awesome and can make any glasses sit straight on their face. I'm a walking example of that. My ears are two different sizes and the bigger on sits higher then the other one. Well, my glasses use to sit straight till James started pulling on them.

I'm sure you will look great!

saltEskin said...

Funny that you posted about the eye doctor too! Thank god for health insurance! I got 4 free boxes of contact lenses! But, I still did have to pay a good amount (more than 59) to see the doctor...because health insurance doesnt cover contact exams! Lame.

I wanna see the glasses, my order just shipped so I should get them soOOOON!

saltEskin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rachel said...

I remember your ear. I thought it was so cool.
If it helps you feel any better, my ears are lopsided. A doctor cut most of it off for a surgery and sewed it back on- CROOKED! Nothing like having all your other ear doctors comment on how your ears are crooked.